Courtesy of Mary Kay
Debby Ryan recently became the cause champion for Mary Kay's "Don't Look Away" campaign, which is about teaching us all about the signs of dating abuse. We know that it can be really hard to step in and speak up to let a friend know that you're noticing troubling signs in her relationship, but Debby has some advice that will make it easier to get involved.
"First of all, if you notice that, you're such a good friend. And I think that if you actually consider someone your friend, you see if they're happy and healthy, and you look at the relationships in their lives, and see if they're feeling a lot more insecure or controlled, or you notice if they're feeling a lot happier and more beautiful," Debby shares with TWIST exclusively. "Noticing stuff like that in your friend is an amazing thing to do. If you notice something, [you can be] like, 'something's not right here, maybe that's not a healthy thing,' or you know, 'that's not okay.'"
"I have personally texted in to the Love Is Respect hotline, 22522, you text 'LoveIs', and you're automatically connected with a safe, confidential, educated peer advocate," Debby shares. "It's someone our age who can really help you figure out what your friend is going through, and even give you pages of information just to send to your friend. Just to be like, 'yo, I love you. So happy to see you in a relationship, just wanted you to know, I don't like seeing you cry, I don't like seeing you sad, or I don't like seeing that you've been more insecure lately. Maybe check this out, do you think so-and-so could have anything to do with it?'"
"It's so good to reach out and [ask] questions, especially when your friends know you're coming from a good place of love," she continues. "Don't be afraid of offending your friend, especially if you're fighting for their heart."
"If you want to get more information first, check out marykay.com/dontlookaway. Make sure you're really educated, and then just go in and listen," she advises. "Really just ask questions and listen to the things that they're not saying. I think that being a good friend is more about listening, and then having the right place to point them to. You might not even have the answer, but telling them you're going to help find the answer and solution with them, I think that's all you need sometimes."
What do you think of Debby's advice? Share your reactions in the comments section below.